I know it feels as though I write these posts all of the time, about how much I love blogging and how terrible I am at it because I have no time, or no inspiration, or whatever my usual excuse it. But this time, I don't have an excuse. I am just stuck. I feel stagnant, like I'm stood in one place unable to move forward whilst everyone else is rushing past making amazing progress, making amazing things and I'm just a little puddle, a little mess.
I've been trying desperately to find words to create something I could be proud of, but instead the only word that comes to mind is 'stagnant', which I guess is what I'm feeling... I've tried to fill my days with lovely things, lovely people, and adventures. For the most part however, I've wanted to stay in bed. I have so much free time to enjoy and I'm not enjoying it. I don't know what to do, and I hate it. I just want to sleep, to waste my days playing games on my phone or mindlessly scrolling through social media. I've tried to read, but I cannot concentrate. I've tried to see people but I end up exhausted. I feel as though I have no purpose.
I want to get better, and this is my way of trying. Please be patient with my while I figure out life.